Be yourself, everyone else is already taken!

April 30, 2009 12:00:00 AM PDT
Focus on yourself and you may actually become a better lover. Sharing their advice is a married couple who have actually tested this theory -- Mike Robbins, author of "Be Yourself, Everyone Else Is Already Taken," and his wife Michelle Robbins, a life coach.

Action ideas:

1) Express Yourself

- Be willing, even if you're scared, to speak your mind and express your emotions in an honest and vulnerable way.

- Do "withholds" with your partner (create time for you and your partner to share things you have been "withholding" from each other...in a safe and honest way).

- Use "I" statements when expressing your feelings or dealing with a conflict ("I feel frustrated that..." as opposed to "why do you always do that annoying thing...").

2) Be Bold

- Have the courage, even if it's hard, ask for what you want (which can be really challenging, especially for women).

- Make genuine requests/ask for what you really want (a "real" request is made without attachment - your partner can say "yes," "no," or make a counter offer and there is no consequence either way).

- Create a "win" file (a file or folder for your partner with requests of things they could do or get for you that would make you happy - Michelle is great at doing this with me).

- Ask for the acknowledgement/appreciation you want (Michelle will raise her hand and say to me, "I would like to be acknowledged"... and then tell me what she would like to be acknowledged for... it works!).

3) Celebrate Who You Are

- Accept, appreciate, and care for yourself.

- Take "me" time (schedule time alone - to do things you love to do for yourself).

- Appreciate yourself so you are not depending on your partner to always be the one to appreciate you (buy yourself flowers, send a card to yourself, pat yourself on the back).

- Look in the mirror and tell yourself what you appreciate about you!

About Mike Robbins:
Mike Robbins is a sought-after motivational speaker, author, seminar leader, and coach who delivers personal development seminars throughout the United States and works with top companies like Wells Fargo, Chevron, NY Life, and AT&T, helping them improve morale, communication, and relationships. Mike delivers over 100 programs each year and his work has been featured on ABC News, the Oprah and Friends radio network, and on numerous TV and radio stations around the country. He's been featured in Forbes, Ladies Home Journal, the Washington Post and more. Mike is a Certified Speaking Professional (CSP), which is the highest earned designation given to less than 6% of all professional speakers worldwide. He lives with his wife and two daughters in the San Francisco Bay Area. Mike is the author of the bestselling book Focus on the Good Stuff (Hardcover, Jossey-Bass/Wiley, August 2007) and the brand new book Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken (Hardcover, Jossey-Bass/Wiley, April 2009)

For more information about Mike, his work, and to see and hear clips of some of his interviews and media placements, visit his online media kit here.

About Michelle Robbins:
Michelle Robbins, in addition to being a stay-at-home mom of our two little girls (Samantha, 3 years and Annarose, 7 months) has a master's degree in psychology from St. Mary's College and is a life coach and workshop leader - specifically working with women on finding and maintaining great relationships with men! She is on "hiatus" from her work as a coach/workshop leader while she is focused on our young girls.

About the book, "Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken":
A new book about the importance of authenticity by local bestselling author Mike Robbins

Authenticity is the buzz word of the moment. "Be true to yourself." "Be your real self." "Be the person, you were meant to be." The message is loud and clear. Or is it? There is pressure from all around (our friends, family members, co-workers, and the media) telling us it's more important to be liked and to fit in than it is to be who we truly are. We're also constantly bombarded with messages telling us we aren't good enough and need to be fixed?especially these days.

Mike Robbins, motivational speaker and author of the brand new book Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken: Transform Your Life with the Power of Authenticity (Hardcover, Jossey-Bass/Wiley, April 2009), teaches people how they can overcome their fear about being who they really are, and accept themselves without a mask, pretentions, bluff or fakery. Robbins writes and speaks about ways people can confront some of their own personal challenges with being honest and genuine and he shares powerful ideas, principles, and practices that when integrated into people's lives on a regular basis can help them access a deeper place of truth, fulfillment, and passion within then. Authenticity leads to improved communication, enhanced relationships, and greater confidence.

Being your authentic self is not for the faint of heart, but once you're willing to truly engage and do the work to become real, your life will be more exciting, meaningful, and satisfying! Today, more than ever, it is essential for people to be themselves and operate with a high level of authenticity - both personally and professionally.

Buy the book on Amazon: Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Already Taken

Book signings:

Thursday, April 16 at 7:00PM
Book Passage, Corte Madera
www.bookpassage.com

Friday, April 17 at 7:00PM
A Great Good Place for Books, Oakland
www.ggpbooks.com


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