Humorous look at surviving marriage

On Marriage: He says: For me, marriage must go beyond the mundane and reach for the romantic. I yearn for a marriage that is a romantic inspiration, a celebration of passions and a terrific long-term opportunity to try out some really kinky Kama Sutra type stuff. Annabelle craves a probing intellectual discourse of ideas with an academic who's willing to change the cat litter.

She says: I would never dream of telling anyone they should get, stay, or stop being married. Unless they were attached to the idea that they were going live "happily ever after." Then I'd tell them they were out of their minds. Wouldn't just "ever after" make more sense?

On having children: He says: I admired my friends for having babies in the same way that I admire Picasso's Guernica, Washington's surprise Christmas attack on Trenton, or how anyone can put together anything from Ikea. Just knowing I could never accomplish any of these things in my lifetime makes them all the more impressive.

She says: But had I known beforehand what we were in for, I might have skipped the whole thing and bought expensive moisturizers instead.

On cohabitation: He says: "Within days of Annabelle's arrival, I became very aware that she demanded solitude and had the housekeeping habits of a feral animal."

She says: "The guy had some sort of nudity radar. When I would take my clothes off even for a second, Jeff would be in front of me cheering as if he'd scored box seats at Fenway Park."

On sex: He says: "I want to have sex every day, but Annabelle only wants to do it once a week. So we compromise-we have sex once a week."

She says: "Jeff says talking about money before you have sex is a turn off, but it's only a turn off if you're talking about not having money. Talking about money before you have sex when you're loaded is actually a turn on."

On couples therapy: Both: We have a suggestion for couples that are thinking of sinking all of their hard earned money on therapy: Go to Paris instead. Get drunk and eat great food. You might eventually get divorced, but at least you'll have the memory of harping at each other in front of Notre Dame instead of in some cramped, windowless therapist's office.


ANNABELLE GURWITCH is an actress and writer. She first gained a comedic following during her years co-hosting Dinner & a Movie on TBS. Annabelle turned her experience of being canned by Woody Allen into the off-Broadway play, touring show, book, and documentary film Fired! Her film premiered on television as a Showtime Comedy Special and has been screened everywhere from The Southwest Film Festival to The Department of Labor on Capitol Hill. She's been a regular commentator on Day to Day and All Things Considered on NPR and a humor columnist for Annabelle has hosted television shows on ABC, VHI, STYLE, and HBO. Her acting credits include: Medium, Boston Legal, Seinfeld, and films: Shaggy Dog, Melvin Goes to Dinner, and Daddy Day Care. Her work off-Broadway garnered her a place in The New York Times Top Ten Performances in Theatre of the Year 2002. Her essays have appeared in: The Los Angeles Times, Child, Glamour, and two anthologies: Note to Self and Rejected! Annabelle doesn't know why, but many of the projects she is involved with end up with exclamation points attached to them. She currently hosts the series WA$TED! on The Planet Green Network. This is her second book and second marriage.

JEFF KAHN is a writer/performer who began his career on MTV's, "The Ben Stiller Show." A few years later, he won an Emmy award for writing on FOX's, "The Ben Stiller Show." It was a moment so unexpected and shocking that he literally cried. (How pathetic is that?) Jeff has written on several other shows including, "Later with Greg Kinnear," "Austin Stories," and "Dilbert." He also has written and produced numerous television pilots, in particular a spin-off of "All-American Girl" starring Margaret Cho. He can be seen on HBO reruns of "Curb Your Enthusiasm," "Entourage," and "The Larry Sanders Show", and in the films, "Tropic Thunder," "40-Year-Old Virgin," and "The Cable Guy." Online, Jeff is featured on the show, "The Writer's Room." His essays can be read online at and in his wife's terrific and very funny book, "Fired!" This is Jeff's very first book and marriage.

After 13 years of marriage, Annabelle Gurwitch and Jeff Kahn have found, "We're just not that into us." In their new memoir, YOU SAY TOMATO, I SAY SHUT UP: A Love Story, actor/comedian/writers/real-life married couple Annabelle and Jeff prove that in marriage, all you need is love-and a healthy dose of complaining, co-dependence, and Pinot Noir.

Described as the Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz of the Apatow generation, Jeff and Annabelle offer their insights on how to survive marriage with their hilarious brand of "he said, she said" wisdom and wit. They are recently touring the country in a stage version of the book which is selling out theaters, and uniting married couples in an evening of sheer bliss and commiseration.

Join Annabelle Gurwitch and Jeff Kahnhave for a Talk & Book Signing at Book Passage in Corte Madera on Saturday March 20, 2010, 7:00 PM. Annabelle and Jeff will be reading from their book.

51 Tamal Vista Blvd.
Corte Madera, CA 94925

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