Bay Area mom opens up about losing LGBTQ+ child to suicide in hopes of helping other families

HAYWARD, Calif. (KGO) -- A Bay Area mother is now opening up about tragically losing her 12-year-old LGBTQ+ child to suicide last year in hopes of helping other families.

With photos of Leo spread across the kitchen table, his mom remembered him and the joy he brought to his family's life.

"This was on Thanksgiving. Our last Thanksgiving. I think Dad was tickling their toes," said Sarah.

If you or your child needs help right away, call the National Suicide Prevention Line at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), call 911, or take your child to the nearest crisis center or emergency department.

"Yeah it's a big smile - a lot of laughter, is that often how you think of him?" asked ABC7 News reporter Tara Campbell.

"Always... so happy," said Sarah.

Tragically, Leo died by suicide not long after having the courage to ask to change his name and pronouns.

"They just wanted to be themselves and be accepted. We had to stop going around certain people because I didn't want to put my kid in that position where someone was going to say something that was going to make them uncomfortable because it's our job to protect them," said Sarah.

Sarah described Leo as a creative and caring kid who crafted a gift for a friend the day he died.

"I think that's the last thing I said was, 'I love you, I'm proud of you for making that' because I don't know," said Sarah as she broke down.

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She hopes by sharing her message and her story that she will help other families.

"All kids deserve to be who they want or whatever they want and I told them that all the time and I meant that," said Sarah.

Even with all the support and love from his family, Leo began to retreat and stopped going to school.

"I had three jobs at the time and quit two of them because I wasn't going to leave my kid home alone by themselves," said Sarah.

Leo attended Bret Harte Middle School in Hayward where they recently honored him at graduation.

MORE: LGBTQIA+ kids more likely to attempt suicide, report says

"Whether Leo is here with us in person or not he's still a part of our Bret Harte Community," said Principal Seana Condit-Gordon. "It was very important to us to find a way to honor his memory and acknowledge he was on the path towards going to high school and completing his education."

In the wake of Leo's death, Condit-Gordon is making a call for more mental health support in schools.

"The ratio of students to counselors is just not sufficient right now. We've got two academic councilors for a student population of almost 600 students," said Condit-Gordon.

And the LBGTQ+ community is among the most vulnerable. According to a 2022 national survey by the Trevor Project, more than 50 percent of transgender and nonbinary youth seriously considered attempting suicide.

SUICIDE PREVENTION: Local resources for those in crisis

Cynthia Garcia is a school counselor and says there are signs to watch for.

"The biggest one is a change in mood. A change in what they're doing. If they've stopped doing things they've loved. If they've isolated themselves. That could get some red flags going," said Garcia.

And if you do see signs or have concerns she says to start by listening.

"Being a non-judgmental listener is a great first step. Just listen to your child and say I'm here to listen. I may not understand everything you're going through, but I'm here to listen," said Garcia.

If you or your child needs help right away, call the National Suicide Prevention Line at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), call 911, or take your child to the nearest crisis center or emergency department.

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