Five easy tips to obtaining a helpful fiancé:
- Start slowly! Every woman wants help from her groom, but overwhelming him with too many wedding details that he hasn't formed opinions about will overload him. Start simple with choices about things guys are interested in: music entertainment, alcohol, photographers, and food. He's not ready to make decisions on centerpieces, decorations, and table linens.
- Compromise. This is a new world to your groom. All of his ideas may not be winners. However, if you want his help, don't shoot down every idea he's got. He just picked out an engagement ring you love, trust him a little!
When you're on a tight budget you generally pick three items you're willing to spend money on, and cut costs everywhere else. Do the same thing with wedding decisions, pick 3 that you feel strongly about and compromise everywhere else. It's BOTH of your days and perhaps the biggest party you'll throw.
- Find fun blogs online and browse them together or send them to him. There are blogs expressing every viewpoint out there. If he connects with other guys getting married he'll be more willing to help plan. We're all going through this together... reading other groom's stories are the best way to realize that! Send him to templeofgroom.com!
- Start a website together. There are tons of free website services to keep your guests well informed. Picking colors for the website is a good way to talk about picking the colors for your wedding!. Guys are more visual than women. Women can imagine how things will look way easier than we can! If you describe chocolate & pink table runners, he doesn't know what it looks like, but if you pick the colors for the website he'll immediately connect. Or show him pictures of the colors online, he'll be able to see what they look like.
- Remember to have fun. This should be the happiest time of your life. If it's not, take a step back, go out on a date and don't talk weddings. Taking a night off is a great way not to overwhelm BOTH of you.
"Temple of Groom" is one of the few wedding blogs on the internet that's written from a male's perspective. However, unlike many men, SuperDave (author of "Temple of Groom") actually cares about wedding details. Proclaiming that he's "not one of those grooms whose only job is to show up on time", Dave's postings appeal greatly to the bride looking to get help from her groom.